There were so many emotions that ran through me. First I was incredulous, then I was actually wounded. Here I am trying to do something nice for someone and they don't appreciate it. Seriously, that went through my head. I ripped off a very mature, "Well, OK then. Nevermind". I left that there for about 30 seconds and then went and deleted all my comments on the thread.
I was stunned by many things.
- I was incredibly sad that someone was that down on themselves
- I was a little incredulous that no one had taught her how to take a compliment (a pet peeve of mine)
- I started to analyze why I had posted the original comment.
Let's look at number 3 for a minute. Why did I post that comment? Was it to make her feel better? Was it to make me feel like a hero? I started to feel like I wasn't doing it for the right reasons? Did I want her to say, "Why thank you Lori, you are so sweet!". Why did I get so angry at her comment? What was my goal?
I also really do believe she is beautiful. She is a musician and plays beautiful music - just that - by itself - makes her beautiful to me. She is using a gift that God gave her to create a thing of beauty. Society today tends to focus on the media, movie-star, model "image" of beauty. But that is about making money, period. Beauty is so much more to me.